Life as a Woman

Funk Life With Community and Woodpecker

I have traditionally avoided funks by being addicted to productivity. If I am constantly in a flurry of activity, I cannot introspect enough to be depressed. I become anxious if I’m not getting stuff done. (I think, lately, because I’m scared of facing myself.) But this semester, I have intentionally lightened my load. The result? […]

RAGE AGAINST THE PENIS PUMPS!

Samantha Bee did a spot on The Daily Show about Medicare funding penis pumps. Now, I know the spin is outrageous, and sometimes rhetorical, and meant for entertainment, but usually there’s truth to what they report on The Daily Show. I thought, I can’t believe it. Sometimes dear Sam Bee goes over the top. So […]

An Ode to My (Unintentionally Feminist) Auto Mechanic

There are about 3 things in my life right now that I wish were different. The main one is that I wish I hadn’t landed, as an adult, a mere 100 miles from where I grew up, in the same state. I wanted to be someplace more urban. Or at least some rural scene that […]

Phony, Imposter, Jerk, Poseur, and other nasty names I call myself

The mind is a terrible thing to waste. Is it? I’d like to waste that bitch sometimes. I’d like to extract my mind from myself, the artist’s plague, and shoot her dead. Or strangle her. Or perhaps torture her for a time, like she’s tortured me as long as I can remember; perhaps that would […]

WTH Femme Files: Mothers without men and movies without women

Most of us who are mothers have enjoyed a man, if only for a few minutes. One of the things I do with my current man (he is worth it) is to (very occasionally) watch awful movies. The most recent? PACIFIC RIM. Really, Guillermo? My man said, “Yeah, he did it so he could get […]

Sometimes, Writing Takes Breaks and Makes Zombies

I was going to post something amusing today about literary submission + rejection and how it is similar to the worst parts about applying to college and online dating. Next week, I promise. I’m going to write a lot this semester about imposter syndrome, rejection, and the harsher realities of the writing life so that […]

The Misogynist Rhetoric Runs Deep: 1980 – present

This is the beginning of a piece about sexual assault: It is deep inside me, a sliver of an idea, an idea that I have tried to banish by reading feminist criticism, by performing in The Vagina Monologues, by reading those sad, captioned photos online that have rape victims holding white signs with handwritten quotations […]

What’s Next? or Why I’ve Been a Shitty Blogger and How I Plan to Change

You probably remember the days when I blogged five days a week. And I doubt you’ve missed me. But I’ve missed you. See, I’m in this grad program for writing. It’s mostly online. I go two times a year for about a week to get my physical learning on, then the rest of the time […]

Curiouser and Curiouser

When I was little, I used to notice when women wore sneakers all the time. Sneakers at church, sneakers at work, sneakers with suits, skirts, jeans, on holidays, on vacation. I was particularly vexed when women wore sneakers with skirts. The above image is a photograph of my feet. In sneakers. With a skirt. I […]

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