Life

RAGE AGAINST THE PENIS PUMPS!

Samantha Bee did a spot on The Daily Show about Medicare funding penis pumps. Now, I know the spin is outrageous, and sometimes rhetorical, and meant for entertainment, but usually there’s truth to what they report on The Daily Show. I thought, I can’t believe it. Sometimes dear Sam Bee goes over the top. So […]

Sometimes, Writing Takes Breaks and Makes Zombies

I was going to post something amusing today about literary submission + rejection and how it is similar to the worst parts about applying to college and online dating. Next week, I promise. I’m going to write a lot this semester about imposter syndrome, rejection, and the harsher realities of the writing life so that […]

What’s Next? or Why I’ve Been a Shitty Blogger and How I Plan to Change

You probably remember the days when I blogged five days a week. And I doubt you’ve missed me. But I’ve missed you. See, I’m in this grad program for writing. It’s mostly online. I go two times a year for about a week to get my physical learning on, then the rest of the time […]

Open Letter to He Who Must Have the Last Word (In A Professional Context)

Dear He, Please note the careful choice of pronoun.  I have never met a woman who is so enamored of delivering a bitter pill of haute vulgarisation to a poor, plebeian other. I never met a woman who cradled her mons pubis while delivering her last word.  Who took such small-minded, bureaucratic joy in lording her position, […]

Open Letter to Women Who Do Not Want Children.

Dear Woman, There is nothing wrong with you. You are self-aware and strong and wise. You are making the right choice. You are the only one who should make that choice. Sex is fun. It is all right to still want to have sex, even if you don’t want to have children. This does not […]

Rainy Mornings And The Working Poor

Child goes to a school that is full of poor kids.  Child is a poor kid. I am proud and resourceful, so Child’s experience of being a poor kid is different from some of the poor kids she goes to school with.  We are also not always poor.  We are never rich, but we are […]

Open Letter to Vanity Publishing Crowd

Dear Book Writer, What is your profession?  I’m dying to know.  I will show up there and take over your clients.  I will prescribe their pills or write their briefs or cobble their soles.  I can slice and stitch with the best of them; after all, I took Home Ec. Or maybe I should show […]

I Made a Terrible Mistake.

I am not good at paying attention to politics. I am annoyed and saddened by the limitations of the scope of the rhetoric. I am convinced that my vote simply doesn’t matter (though I show up at the polls, just in case), and that rich people are totally in charge of this country, whatever histrionic […]

Oh God, the Feelings! And Candy Land.

It has been an intense month for Child and I.  I am a generally sensitive person with loads of feelings. But I have been in the midst of this confronting-feelings tsunami for about a month. There are two things I want to tell you about. 1.  My sister’s wedding.  I already told you about it, […]

Birthday #7: One Mother’s Oldness

Child says, “Seriously, mommy.” kind of a lot. It sounds like an accusation.  Like, “How dare you doubt my perfect logic?  I am seven, and therefore infallible.”  Seven.  Six plus one.  Five plus two.  Wasn’t she an infant mere months ago?  How is this possible? Here’s Child over her cake.  I like seven.  I liked […]

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